The Alaskan Blob

As reported last week by the Anchorage Daily News, a twelve-mile long blob of organic material was discovered floating in the icy Arctic waters off the north coast of Alaska. What was initially thought to be an oil slick is in fact some unknown biological substance or marine organism, thick and gooey and emitting a strong smell.



Gordon Brower, from the North Slope Borough’s Planning and Community Services Department, assembled a team and was joined by the Coast Guard to investigate the substance. He stated that nothing like it had ever been seen in the area before. Brower said the material was “pitch black” when it came into contact with ice, discolouring the ice and clinging to it. Brower and his investigative team also saw jellyfish entangled in the mystery goo and the carcass of a dead goose was handed in to the borough’s wildlife department, with bones and feathers being all that remained of the animal.

But before anyone begins to freak out and think some kind of flesh-eating alien lifeform is floating towards a beach near you, samples of the Alaskan blob have been sent to Anchorage for testing, with results expected this week. If no further information is forthcoming, perhaps we can assume that the substance is indeed a major concern - so much so that the authorities believe information dissemination would create widespread panic…as the alien blob drifts across the globe devouring all in its path…an insidious invasion by a faceless usurper…

…the blob was last seen, moving with the current, north past Barrow.



by Max Drake
(Freelance writer and artist for GritFX.)

(Source: Anchorage Daily News – “Huge blob of Arctic goo floats past Slope communities” by Don Hunter)

Ursus Arctos Horribilis

The Grizzly bear (Ursus arctos horribilis) can be found in Alaska, western Canada and northwestern USA from Washington to Wyoming. Eight feet tall on their hind legs and weighing up to 1,500 pounds, the Grizzly is a formidable animal to meet in the forest. So what do you do if you happen to come face to face with these majestic beasts?

Unlike smaller black bears, an adult Grizzly is too large to climb a tree successfully to escape danger. They will more often than not stand their ground. If cubs are nearby, a female Grizzly will defend them to the death and this is the most common cause of human fatality. However, a big Grizz will normally avoid contact with people.

If you’re camping, make sure you keep a clean campsite. Don’t leave food scraps lying around as this will surely attract a Grizz, and once the bear has arrived, he’ll soon realise there is nice fresh meat in the form of you inside the tent. Hanging food or scraps from trees at a height unattainable for a bear is one way of keeping your campsite safe, but the best way would be to seal scraps and food in plastic bags, and preferably inside hard, sealable containers.

If you come face to face with a mighty Grizz, it is imperative to not make eye contact. The temptation to gaze on these wonderful creatures may be strong, but the Grizz will take it as a sign of aggression. As the bear will normally go straight for the head, staring at a Grizz could mean adios cranium. Never run from a Grizz – they can run faster than you whether uphill or down, and nothing will make you soil your shorts faster than being chased by a roaring Grizzly.

So lay prone if face to face with a Grizzly. Put your face down in the dirt with your hands gripped around your neck. Spread your legs – this will make it harder for the bear to flip you over, even though leaving the testicles exposed will be a tough ask for a guy. Once the Grizzly has determined you are not a threat, it will normally take off and leave you whimpering on the forest floor.

Be responsible when in Grizzly country – make noise when travelling and remember to follow Rangers’ advice. If food is left at a campsite and a bear is enticed, it will often return to look for more. The bear can then become a threat to campers and Rangers may be forced to kill it. Remember that you are in their environment, so display respect at all times.

by Dave
(Dave is a senior designer and partner at GritFX.)