This is Natalie Dylan (a pseudonym). She is a 22 year-old college student who is auctioning her virginity online. That’s right folks – she is selling her hymen to the highest bidder. She sees this as a business opportunity – originally the idea was to pay for a masters degree in Women’s Affairs (yes, you heard right), but since the auction began in July last year, other doors have opened for this enterprising young whore (I mean, lady).
Ms Dylan first rose to infamy last September when she appeared on the misogynistic Howard Stern radio show in the US. So far, the auction has had over 10,000 responses, with bidding reaching US$3.8 million! An unidentified Australian businessman is the leading bidmeister. With that kind of money, who needs a college degree? With the offer to write a book and a possible movie deal in the works (please, nooooo!), Ms Dylan has not set an end date to her auction. Of course not – ya gotta milk it for all it’s worth.
Nat explained she is willing to undergo lie detector tests and gynaecological exams to prove that what she is selling is the real article. She says that she has been approached by all manner of weirdos and lonely guys – from men actually seeking a relationship (which is not on the table – it’s a strictly one-night affair) to others who are excessively graphic in their descriptions of what they would like to do to this young flower should they win the auction. Ms Dylan said the idea came to mind after her own sister paid for her degree by working for a time in a brothel.
Some might find this genius – but it sets a dangerous precedent. I mean, what is next on the horizon? Taboos are no longer taboo, sacred acts no longer sacred, and human dignity is being stripped to the bone without anyone even realising it. But, for fear it may leave me behind, I too am hopping on the ol’ gravy train. So you’ll excuse me while I go list my scrotum on Ebay.
by Max Drake
(Freelance writer and artist for GritFX.)